Thym 4 Tea with Mikita

The Truth About Quiet Quitting and How to Get Back On Track

In this episode, Mikita gets real about 'quietly quitting'—that sneaky process where we slowly start to pull back, whether it's at work, in our relationships, or even in how we live day to day. It’s not about walking away all at once, but more about that gradual shift where we stop giving it our all. Let’s talk about how this happens, why it happens, and what we can do to turn things around.

   Key Discussion Points:
- What quietly quitting really means—it’s not just about work
- The emotional journey that leads to quietly quitting: burnout, feeling       unappreciated, and fear of making changes
- Recognizing the early signs and figuring out how to get your spark back
- How routine and autopilot can take you from thriving to just surviving

 Episode Summary

Quietly quitting doesn’t happen overnight—it’s a slow fade that can creep into your job, relationships, and even your day-to-day life. In this episode, Mikita shares her thoughts on how burnout, feeling undervalued, and fear of change can lead us to quietly quit, often without even realizing it. We’ll dig into how to spot the signs early and what you can do to get back to truly living instead of just getting by. If you’ve ever felt like you’re just coasting through life, this one’s for you. Let’s figure out how to stop quietly quitting and get that fire back.


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Speaker 1:

We've all been in spaces and relationships or jobs where we just don't feel like the people appreciate the hard work that we do and when we start to feel burnout, when we start to feel used, when we start to feel like our feelings and what we're going through doesn't matter who's listening, who cares. That's when we really need to start creating that space to create time for yourself. Because that's when that self-reflection is so important, because sometimes we have to recharge and we have to dream again. Hey there, I'm Makita, a small town girl with big dreams who started a podcast with an old headset and a laptop at my kitchen table and made my dreams come true. On my podcast, time for Tea with Makita, we chat about living life unapologetically, on your terms, from career advice, entrepreneurship, relationships and everything in between. This is your one-stop shop for real conversations and inspiration. If you're looking for connection, then you've found it here. Join me every Tuesday as we dive into those sometimes hard-to-have conversations. So grab your cup of tea or coffee and get comfy, because this is Time for Tea with Makita and the tea is definitely hot. Ever feel like you need a superpower boost of motivation with exclusive tips and tools with your goals in mind. Well, say hello to your new inspiration hotspot the Tuesday Tea Newsletter, your weekly infusion of big thinking energy that'll propel you to chase your wildest dreams and never shy away from using the power of your voice. Sign up for the Tuesday Tea Newsletter today at beautifullyunbalancedcom, and elevate your goals to the next level. Welcome back, I'm Makita, and I want to thank you for sharing your time, your space and, of course, that amazing energy with me today.

Speaker 1:

Today's episode is one that I think will resonate deeply with many of you, because it definitely hit a spot for me with many of you, because it definitely hit a spot for me. Today. I am talking about quiet quitting. Now, this isn't just something that happens in the workplace, my friends. It can sneak up into our personal lives, our relationships and even our self-care routines. If you've been feeling like you're just going through the motions or like the fire inside of you is slowly fading, then this episode is for you. Buckle up and let's get ready, because the tea is definitely hot.

Speaker 1:

All right, you guys, before we jump into talking about quietly quitting, I want to set the scene. I want to set us up. So I want to start with a quote, and the quote today comes from Sarah J Roberts, who is very inspirational for me. If you haven't checked her out, you definitely should. It says you have the power to shift your life in a new direction. Don't let comfort rob you of courage. I want to say that one more time you I'm talking to you, my friend have the power to shift your life in a new direction. Don't let comfort rob you of your courage.

Speaker 1:

Now, this is such a powerful reminder when we're talking about quietly quitting, because what often happens is we get real comfortable, even if that comfort means we're stuck in a place that no longer serves us. What I mean by no longer serves us. Sometimes I forget that. You know, we go through different seasons in our lives. We enter different chapters. We may not even realize that we're quietly quitting. So we're going to dive into what it means to quietly quit. Whether we're talking about our jobs, our relationships or our dreams, what happens is we wake up one day and we're feeling drained and disconnected, and comfort can become the enemy of growth if we're not careful. And that's what I want to explore today how we can shift out of quietly quitting and reignite your passion for life. So, most of the times when I have these conversations with you guys, it's usually something that has affected me. I've been through and I was able to come out on the other end, or sometimes, you know I'm still sitting in it come out on the other end, or sometimes, you know, I'm still sitting in it.

Speaker 1:

So a couple of years ago, I ran across this article that was talking about quietly quitting, and as I was reading the article, I was like, oh my gosh, this is the term I'm looking for. Like this is how I feel. Like I was in the nursing field, which I still am but I was in a place where I just felt like everything was just so routine. There was no challenge to my life, I didn't feel like it was going anywhere, I was just doing the things that was necessary to move. And the thing is that when we're not inspired to create, whether it's at work or in our personal life or within our relationships, everything is affected. We think, oh, I don't feel challenged at work, I'm not happy there, but all of that stuff trickles down into our relationships. It trickles down into how we show up for ourselves and the people in our lives. Whether we recognize that or not, we start peeling back the layers Underneath all that, you can see how the willingness to sit in comfort has allowed you to sit in comfort in other situations in your life that aren't moving anywhere either.

Speaker 1:

So let's break down first what quietly quitting really is. So for me, quietly quitting felt like I was just existing. I wasn't doing anything creative, I wasn't inspiring anything. I was just getting up every day with the same routine, same everything and just going through the motions of everyday life with no real desire, and I had got to the point where I was actually contemplating quitting my job. It's like I'm going to quit, I'm going to leave this job, I just need something else, I need another outlet, and this was all happening before I even started my podcast. So I was just searching for this thing and I'm like I know I have a purpose here and nursing has been this great space for me to grow as an individual and recognize that challenges come and I can handle it and I can also give back and be a pillar in the community. But it has to be more to this thing and the idea of really putting myself out there, I think, was the most uncomfortable thing I've ever done in my life, but also the most rewarding.

Speaker 1:

They say uncertainty can kill your dreams. Because when we get uncertain and we can't predict the outcome, then there comes this level of should I sit in the comfort of where I'm at or should I have the courage to make a change? And I'm going to tell you right now that anything that I've ever done thus far has come with uncertainty. That I've ever done thus far has come with uncertainty, and from that uncertainty I've had the best rewards, whether it's in career-wise relationships or just fulfilling my purpose in life. I wouldn't trade it for anything.

Speaker 1:

So when we talk about what it means for you and this chapter that you have in your life, I feel like we all go through different chapters, right? Each growth, each movement. Like my 20s, my 30s. They were all leading up to the new season, to the new chapter. Whatever you want to call it. You can call it season time and chapters, but we all go through a period of growth, a period where things start to shift and we can decide to really look inward and start reflecting and grow with it and recognize what it is that we need. Or we can sit in comfort and just be okay with no growth. And I don't know about you, but I want to live life to its fullest. I think no one says it better than Maya Angelou when she says my mission in life is not merely to survive but to thrive. So I don't want to just be in this space where I'm just surviving. I want to thrive and I want you to thrive as well.

Speaker 1:

So quietly quitting is that mentally checking out. It's mentally saying I'm going to do enough to get through this. I'm going to do enough in this relationship just to say I tried. I'm going to do enough with putting myself out there in this business, in this dream that I have just to say I did something. I'm just going to do enough to survive this. But the thing is we can't just do enough because the people in our lives, whether you're in a relationship or you're working, they can recognize that you're going through the motions, they can tell that you're just doing enough.

Speaker 1:

And we all go through different periods in our life where we have to kind of step back and decide what our next step is going to be. But when you find yourself at that moment where you feel that when you wake up, there's no passion behind what you do, you stop putting in the effort or care into things that used to matter to you, when you find yourself saying what's the point? More often, when you're avoiding difficult conversations or changes because it's easier to stay in the same place. If any of these resonate with you, you might be in a place of quiet quitting, because most of the time we don't even recognize that we're there and, honestly, until I read that article I didn't recognize I was there. But I was also in this period of transition Because, as I said earlier, I was like I'm about to quit my job. I knew that I needed more. I knew that I needed a challenge. I knew that my purpose wasn't being fulfilled to the extent that it should be.

Speaker 1:

They say small steps lead to big transformation. Say small steps lead to big transformation. So don't despise the day of small beginnings, because those small beginnings are preparing you for something greater. This is where you can start to reignite that fire and quiet quitting. If you're in that space right now where you feel like man, no-transcript, easy, and it doesn't happen overnight.

Speaker 1:

For me, where I was sitting in it, I had to sit and stew in that thing for a minute. I had to sit there and be real uncomfortable with the fact that now I understood, had a turn to go with the feelings that I had. And then it was like, okay, so what are you going to do about it? Are you going to quit your job? Like, how are you moving through this thing? And I had to learn how to sit in silence with it. And what I mean by sitting in silence is that we always have a lot of noise coming at us. When we're sitting there reflecting and thinking about what our next steps should be, we have the noise and thoughts of things other people tell us we should be doing, the ideas of where we think we should have been or what we should have achieved so far, what we should be doing versus what we need to be doing. So when we start filtering out other people's expectations, other people's thoughts of what they think we should do and how they think we should go about things, when we quiet all of that down and we can actually listen to ourselves without all the chatter that's what I mean about sitting in silence.

Speaker 1:

So, as you're sitting there in that space for you, I want you to think about how do you want to move through this thing? Where do you want to start? I think the hardest thing for anyone is the starting, because it always feels like you don't know where to start. It feels like starting something is so hard. It's like what's the first step? What should I do that? What should I do? But the thing is, when we just make it simple and say the first thing I need to do is just admit that I need to change, the first thing I need to do is start having a conversation. The first thing I need to do is recognize where I'm at and where I want to go, is recognize where I'm at and where I want to go.

Speaker 1:

So a lot of ways that we can reunite our passion is to reconnect with your why. Why did you start the job? Why did you start the relationship or what made you start the journey in the first place that you're on? What was the passion or joy that first sparked everything for you? When you get to your why and I'm going to tell you when I'm asking myself that why, question, I always ask myself it three times, because the first time is always the surface level. Well, why did I start the job? Oh, because I wanted to help other people. Okay, yeah, why did you want to help other people? Why did you want to do that. Why are you in this relationship, in this marriage? Why are you still there today?

Speaker 1:

Because after you answer the first why, and you re-ask that question well, why is that? And then go a little farther and say, well, why is that? When you peel back those layers, you're going to get to the real why and from there you'll be able to reconnect to what's really, that spark, that thing and decide what's next. Do I really want to continue in this thing? And I don't want you to focus on how far you are from where you want to be.

Speaker 1:

You know, in life, you know, we're always striving to be better and we always think we should be four steps ahead and in reality we always feel like we're six steps back. But when we start to slow it down and stop focusing on the end but focus on the moment because a lot of times I know for me the anxiety sits in is when I'm thinking about the future. My mind is so far ahead in the future of what I think is going to happen, what I think should be happening, that I forget what's happening right now, the change and the transformation that's happening right now within me, around me, and the transformation that's happening right now within me, around me, for me, to me, because when transformation happens to you, it happens to everything around you, and the people around you are blessed with the transformation as well. They get to benefit from your growth and your transformation. So, focus on your now and don't get caught up in where you want to be at, because if you stay focused on your now, if you stay in your moment, when you get to that, you'll appreciate it so much more.

Speaker 1:

Another thing is focus on your small victories. Each day, each day, you worked on something that's going to get you closer to where you want to go. Remember big steps. Always have small steps that get you there. When you take small steps, you will get to the big transformation. You will get to the big transformation.

Speaker 1:

And when we talk about having those hard conversations, when you're sitting in silence and things get real uncomfortable, you know the first thing that you need to do is sit down and have the hard conversation, and that's whether it's with a partner or a friend, or even with yourself, because sometimes the hardest conversation is talking and letting myself know girl, it's time, it's time for you to get it together, it's time to stop avoiding and time to get some clarity and some honesty here. Some clarity and some honesty here. And once I've had that talk with myself, once I said you got this, you can do this, go for it. And it's easier sometimes to have that conversation with yourself versus if you're in a relationship, you have a partner or a friend that you're going to have to sit down and have the tough conversation. But remember that when you're in these moments and you're having the conversation, it's not about right or wrong, it's about just sharing and being honest. It's about being able to move through where you're at right now to get to where you want to go. And all of this just means that you're creating space for yourself.

Speaker 1:

We often quietly quit because we're burnt out, we feel that we're unappreciated. You know what I mean. We've all been in spaces and relationships or jobs where we just don't feel like the people appreciate the hard work that we do, you know. And when we start to feel burnout, when we start to feel used, when we start to feel like our feelings and what we're going through doesn't matter who's listening, who cares, that's when we really need to start creating that space to create time for yourself, because that's when that self-reflection is so important because sometimes we have to recharge and we have to dream again. Right, you know, as a kid I used to dream so big. Nothing was impossible. When you were a kid, you could dream the biggest dream and all the adults would say, yep, you can do that. Well, it still holds true today.

Speaker 1:

Continue to dream big, continue to allow yourself to think outside of the box, because a lot of times I feel like we start to quietly quit because we try to shrink ourselves into boxes that are too small and what happens is we start to dim our light. That light starts to slowly go out because that box gets smaller and smaller and smaller. And another thing I feel like, especially at one point in my life and sometimes I don't need anyone to tell me I'm doing a good job, or that you know I'm a really hard worker, or you know, you know I'm just doing really great I have to be the person that validates my worth. So sometimes we look outward for other people to recognize us and we feel like when they recognize us, then we can shine brighter and then the box gets a little bit bigger. But when you start self-validating yourself and all the huge things that you've done, all the accomplishments, all the small wins that add up to the big things. When you start really looking at that, that's when that light starts to shine and it gets brighter and the box gets a little bit bigger, because the only person that needs to validate your worth is you.

Speaker 1:

We stop feeling burnt out because when you are validating yourself, you're not putting too much on you, right? When you're validating yourself, you're not trying to prove something to someone else. You've already proved it to yourself, so you don't have to go above and beyond and work yourself to the bone and do all these extra things to prove that you're a go-getter. You already know you're a go-getter. You already know what your worth is. You know what you bring to the table. You know how your value can impact and make a change, no matter where you go. And as you start creating that space for yourself, you will embrace your small wins. You will embrace and connect with your why, you will reignite your passion.

Speaker 1:

Now, I know these steps may seem really simple, but trust me, they can create big change over time. And if you allow yourself the opportunity to slow down and sit in that silence and don't expect it to happen so quickly, because, I'm telling you, when I was sitting in that silence and I was having these conversations with myself and I had to really think about how I wanted to show up and what my next move or step would be, it didn't just come to me and I had to listen with an open mind. I had to trust myself and not let fear be the thing that says, oh no, uh-uh, you can't do that. We don't want to put ourselves out there. So let's go the easier route. Let's get back to comfort, because comfort felt good, but we remember that comfort is what led us to this place that we're at right now, where we're quietly quitting and we're just not happy. So, like I said, if you're just doing enough, if you avoid the challenges and the opportunities for growth, if you stop caring about the outcome, then you're just there.

Speaker 1:

If you're in a relationship, are you physically present but emotionally checked out? Are you growing through the motions with your partner, but the spark is gone? Are you avoiding deep conversations or simply not making an effort? You may be quietly quitting In life. I want to ask you are you just existing day to day, going through your routine without feeling truly alive? Do you lack excitement or joy for things that once made you happy? Are you avoiding setting new goals or pursuing things that fulfilled you?

Speaker 1:

I'm telling you now if you recognize any of these things in you, you're not alone. It doesn't mean you're stuck here forever. It's just that it means that in this season, in this chapter, in this time, that there is room for growth and transformation for you, that you are in the season for transformation, that you're in the season for change, because now that you know, now you can start the growth process. Now you can start looking inward to see how you need to move forward. Your purpose isn't tied to perfection. It's tied to your persistence. Remember, you don't have to have everything figured out today, tomorrow or the next week. You just need to take the first step. That's right for you.

Speaker 1:

Whether you've been quietly quitting in your career, relationship or personal life, it's not too late. Your journey is ever evolving. It's the recognition, it's the understanding and knowing where you're at. And remember, you're going to start small, You're going to stay persistent and you're going to remember that you are worthy of living a life full of purpose and joy. And I want to challenge you this week to identify one area where you've been quietly quitting and take one small step toward change. So, whether it's reaching out to someone, picking up a dream that you've set aside, or simply reconnecting with yourself, don't let comfort rob you of the courage to fully live. All right, you guys, that tea was definitely hot. I hope that this episode really resonated with you. If it did, or you know someone that could use a little reminder, a little inspiration, share it with them and, as always, tune in to the next episode of Time for Tea with Makita, where we'll continue to explore how you can start to live unapologetically and rediscover what lights you up. Until next time, my friends namaste.

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