Thym 4 Tea with Mikita
Welcome to 'Thym 4 Tea with Mikita,' where we spill the tea on all things self-care and living boldly. This podcast is your invitation to cozy up and dive deep into conversations that get real about mindfulness, wellness, and finding joy in the beautifully messy journey of life. We're here to chat about the big stuff, the little stuff, and everything in between, with a focus on embracing our true selves and stepping into our power. So grab your cup of tea, get comfy, and discover what it means to live unapologetically.
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Thym 4 Tea with Mikita
Embracing Change: Lessons I Learned About Letting Go and Self-Worth
Have you ever wondered how to let go of the past and embrace your true self? Join me, Mikita, on a heartfelt exploration of the complex emotions that accompany the process of letting go. Through personal stories and deep conversations, we'll navigate through feelings of sadness, frustration, and shame, unraveling how these emotions connect to our self-worth. This episode is a safe haven for anyone seeking to confront hidden feelings and bravely step into self-acceptance, with insights on how embracing change can lead to profound personal growth.
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#thym4teawithmikita #manifest #purposefulliving #liveunapplogectically #freedom #podcast #womeninpodcast #podcastlife #empoweringwomen
When I speak of letting go, one thing that I didn't realize was that it wasn't just about fear. When I break down all the emotions that I feel and that I felt and my vocabulary expands on emotions it's that there's more to it than just fear and anger and happiness. You know, there's sadness, there's frustration, there is uncertainty, there's shame Like there's just so many emotions. Hey, there, I'm Makita, a small town girl with big dreams who started a podcast with an old headset and a laptop at my kitchen table and made my dreams come true. On my podcast, time for Tea with Makita, we chat about living life unapologetically, on your terms, from career advice, entrepreneurship, relationships and everything in between. This is your one-stop shop for real conversations and inspiration. If you're looking for connection, then you found it here. Join me every Tuesday as we dive into those sometimes hard to have conversations. So grab your cup of tea or coffee and get comfy, because this is time for Tea with Makita, and the tea is definitely hot. Ever feel like you need a superpower boost of motivation with exclusive tips and tools with your goals in mind? Well, say hello to your new inspiration hotspot the Tuesday Tea Newsletter, your weekly infusion of big thinking energy that will propel you to chase your wildest dreams and never shy away from using the power of your voice. Sign up for the Tuesday Tea News today at beautifullyunbalancedcom and elevate your goals to the next level.
Speaker 1:Welcome back, it is definitely time for some tea. I'm your host, makita. First of all, I just want to thank you so much for sharing your time, your space and, of course, your amazing energy with me today. So today's episode is going to be a little different, because this time I want to talk about the journey, and I want to first start by saying that in no way am I an expert on life. I am just like you. I am still figuring life out. No one is perfect. We are all trying to not just discover what our purpose is and to live in that truth, but we're all trying to be the best versions of ourselves and to live life in a way that is true to who we are. That makes us proud and gives us purpose, and I hope, through my stories and what I share, helps other people to feel seen, to feel heard and to know that you're not alone in your journey and to know that you're not alone in your journey.
Speaker 1:Of course, each of our journeys look and feel so different, but we can all, at the same time, understand what that feeling is like, the feeling of uncertainty. We know what fear feels like. We know what it feels like to go through a hard time, and we also know what it feels like when someone holds space for us, when someone accepts us for who we are. And in this space, I want you to know that it is definitely a safe space for you to be your unperfect self, your beautifully unbalanced self, and to love on yourself in whatever way makes you feel that coincides with your beliefs. So, with that being said, I want to start this off with a quote by Alan Watts. It says the only way to make sense out of change is to plunge into it, move with it and join the dance.
Speaker 1:And that is so true, for when, how I started this year off, I had this great epiphany that my word for this year, the thing that I would hold dear to me and that I would strive to do is to let go. To let go of fear, to let go of uncertainty, shame, doubt, all of these things that tend to hold us back and keep us from walking in our truth, to living life unapologetically, in a way that supports who we are. I didn't know that life would have so many bumps, curve roads, dead ends, and that I would go through so much in such a short amount of time. But I am not ungrateful for it Now. I'm not going to lie At the time that I was going through it.
Speaker 1:And sometimes you know like, just like life, everything kind of hits you differently. Sometimes when we think we're over something, it kind of comes back and we're like, oh, I didn't really fully heal from that. You know, I accepted it but I haven't healed from it, and I think that's a lot of times how we all feel about certain things in our life and we're going through it. But there are two big lessons that I learned this year. One is that grief is hard. It fucking sucks. There's no way around it. It sucks. It doesn't matter whether it's the death of a loved one, a loss of a friendship, a change in a career that you thought you were going to grow into and eventually retire from one day. Whatever that loss is, grief sucks.
Speaker 1:The second thing that I've learned this year, when I talk about letting go, is that shame is very crippling, and what I didn't realize is that my sense of shame is attached to my feeling of worthiness. And when I speak of letting go, one thing that I didn't realize it than just fear and anger and happiness there's sadness, there's frustration, there is uncertainty, there's shame, there's just so. And when I had the idea that I would really reflect and see what it looks like for me to let go, and I sort of kind of challenged people around me to give me their definition of letting go and, as you know, I spoke to a lot of people on this episode throughout this season of this podcast on what are some things that they let go and how did they overcome that let go and what did it look like, where did they start and how did they get there? Like that was like the biggest thing, like what did you let go of to transform into the person that you are today. And in the reflection of all of that, I had to come to terms with some of the things that I had buried really deep that I didn't necessarily want to confront.
Speaker 1:It's easy to confront, confront the surface layer stuff. It's much harder to confront the stuff that's deep down and rooted and makes us feel icky and uncomfortable and just like do I really want to go there Because sometimes once you open that, you can't just bottle it back up Once it's out there, it's out there and that's it. You got to kind of wrestle with it. You can ignore it, but it shows up in denial, it shows up in frustration and anger and resentment. It comes back.
Speaker 1:So when we think about grief, grief is defined as this intense sorrow or sadness that we feel when we lose someone or something. It's often associated with death but can also involve, like I said, loss of relationships, career changes, health changes and it's a natural response to loss. And it can be complicated and there's no time limit to grief, which I think is so hard because you know, when we're grieving we just want to like I just want to get on the other side of it. You know I don't want to go through the process of the grief. You know I just want to get to the place where I see other people are at that have made it through grief. Can I just get there and just kind of be done with it, because it hurts too much to stay here and move past it. I don't want to stay in that and grief is such a hard thing to talk about Beginning of this year, when I was thinking about my word and how I would use the idea of letting go.
Speaker 1:I had no idea, like I said, I had no idea that it would even bring up the idea of grief. But I lost my best friend to metastatic breast cancer and we wasn't prepared, we didn't even know, she didn't even know, and it just hit us, you know, like she was having some back pain that we thought, you know, it's just like. You know we get older. You know life happens. We're not as young as we used to be and you know she was just like you know, just go to the chiropractor, you know. Just. You know, do therapy or something, and you know things would get better. And it didn't get better and it ended up being a diagnosis of guess what? You have metastatic breast cancer that has spread and within two weeks she had passed and it was hard and I don't think death is ever easy.
Speaker 1:But what happened was as I was going through and dealing with the loss and I realized there was so much loss and grief surrounding so many people, like it just kind of opened up this conversation for people to share that their loss, their grief, to talk about their loved one. And I remember my husband telling me we had went to the store and I saw something. I was like, oh my God, she would love this, like this would be something I would have bought her. And she'd have been like, oh, let me pay you. And I'm like, can't pay me, like it's a gift, get accepted. And she would find some way to, you know, buy me coffee or do something really nice for me to show that she was appreciative. Because she was just one of those people that if you did something for her, it was in her nature to show gratitude. She never took anything for granted and I love that about her. And when she would do nice things like you would not necessarily know that she did something nice for people she didn't brag about it. She didn't tell you what she done, she would just do it out of the kindness of her heart.
Speaker 1:And in that I was remembering when I was telling my husband like I would definitely get this for her, like she would have loved this, and he was like you know, and I said so much like talking about her I was like, oh, I know you're probably tired. He was like, no, that's how we keep people alive. You talk about her and you mention her name and you share the stories, like, don't stop sharing the stories. Share the stories, like, don't stop sharing the stories. And it was like giving me permission to grieve her loss out loud.
Speaker 1:To talk about her was a process of grieving for me and I realized that with my father I never really grieved. It's hard to talk about someone you don't know. It's hard to long and miss something that you never had. And I say that because of this. It made me realize that I've never dealt with the idea that I never knew my father. He passed away when I was an infant and I never liked to talk about it. Growing up, my mom would always share stories and made us feel like we were really connected and that we knew him. But this idea that deep inside I was grieving, I was longing for to see his face, to have a memory, to know what it felt like to have him in my life, I longed for something that I never had, that I never had. That response of wanting that so bad and knowing that it could never happen was a sense of loss and through that process of that grief I was able to come to terms with that and accept it and to speak out loud that I long for that.
Speaker 1:I'm always envious of people that grew up with both their parents, that have a father, and I'm always like you just don't know what that means. Like your father is alive, you can hug him, touch him, call them. I don't know. I make up stories in my head about what it would be like and what it would feel like and all the things that I would say and do, but I have no idea of what that really is. So I get that some relationships are strenuous and it doesn't look like the fairy tales on the TV shows, and I'm okay with that too.
Speaker 1:But the idea that I had started this journey with letting go it doesn't mean I was letting go of grief. That's not what I learned. What I learned was that it was okay to let my emotions about grief, about my loss, that I was okay to express it. I could let go of all those things I was holding onto, all these feelings of longing and wanting and just wishing that I could speak those things out, that it was okay for me to share my feelings. I didn't have to bottle them up and pretend like it was okay, like I normally did, but I could express it and I was like, oh my goodness, like this is what it means to let go. It's such a weight to say these things out loud and I didn't really realize that I was in that specific space of longing until and I think I told this story before but we went to my father's grave and it's something that I don't do very often.
Speaker 1:But my mom called us and she was like let's go put some flowers on your father's grave for Memorial Day. My dad served in the military, he was Army and not all of us could come, because I have siblings that live out of state and it was like two days before Memorial Day, so everybody necessarily not off or were coming to town or whatever. So three of my siblings that live close by, we all, we did, we um, we got together and on the way there my mom rode with me and I'm not a very I'm not very good at vulnerability. You know this idea of being open with my emotions. Almost to me it feels like a weakness, like, oh my gosh, I don't want to show weakness. I got to be strong. I have to put on this front, even if it's not true. As long as I can fake like I am okay and it's just, it'll be okay.
Speaker 1:And that's how I started this ride out with my mom and I just remember my mom talking and she was rambling and I'm like what is she? She's just rambling, telling these stories and all these things. I'm like what is she talking about? And I realized that she was feeling the same thing, that I was feeling this longing, the sense of loss, and that as we got closer and closer, both of our grief was there. And I reach out and I grab her hand and I hold it in mine and we didn't have to say anything. But I said this is hard. And she said, yes, this is hard. He was the love of my life. I will always miss him.
Speaker 1:And I realized that all those stories that she told us growing up wasn't necessarily about sharing them with us. You know, it was her way of keeping his memory alive, of being close to him, of retaining a memory of him, because with each story she told, she could visualize him what he was wearing, probably, what he smelled like, what he looked like, his hair, his touch, his feel. You know, those are the things that I long for, that I wish I had memory of but didn't. But with each story she told, she was able to grieve and to be vulnerable with her grief by sharing those stories with us. And they wasn't Superman stories or perfection stories. She told whatever story came to mind. That's one thing I like about my mom she's very open and honest and she's not going to sugarcoat it coded. But I knew that with each story I was like this is how she dealt with that loss, this is how she got through it. And in that moment of me just holding her hand and saying this is tough, this is hard, I was giving her permission to be vulnerable and saying this is tough, this is hard was given her permission to be vulnerable and say this is a lot right now. And there's so many emotions that I'm feeling.
Speaker 1:The next thing that I learned because if you're in the state of loss, if you are, if you lost someone, if you lost a relationship because relationships are tough too, you know I remember ending a friendship with one of my friends, one of my closest friends, one of my closest friends and, honestly, even after the friendship had ended, I didn't truly accept it. I felt like eventually, one of us would pick up the phone and we would call. I'm a Capricorn, so I'm stubborn, so I was waiting for the other person to do it, and so much time had passed do it, and so much time had passed and I just realized that we had grown into two entirely different people and then, if that relationship was truly worth saving, we would have both already reached out. Some relationships are not necessarily healthy. Sometimes we trauma bond with people and the only thing that holds us together is the trauma. And once you grow and move past that trauma, you realize that that relationship was only holding space for the worst part of your life, not the best part, not the person that you are trying to become, because no one wants to stay in that. We all want to rebuild and grow from it.
Speaker 1:And one of the things that I realized is that not all relationships can be repaired and that it's okay for certain people to be in our lives for certain seasons and reasons. It's not to say that they, you know, didn't have a purpose. They did. Without that connection, without that relationship, I don't think you get to the next step, because I truly believe that everything serves a purpose. Even the hard stuff serves a purpose and we learn so much about ourselves when we start reflecting and looking back at life and be like.
Speaker 1:What did I learn from that relationship? You know, what did it teach me? And not just the bad things, but like the good things. What did it teach me about myself, about the person that I, but like the good things? What did it teach me about myself, about the person that I want to be, about staying true to who I am, my values. What did it teach me about setting boundaries?
Speaker 1:You know, and we talk about the loss and grief of career changes. We've all been in situations where we know people who have put their whole life in a career. They have a whole life in this degree and have to grieve the loss that you lost your job, the company has made a change and now you're being moved to another place and you're like but this is what I love to do, this is where I thought I was going to retire from. You know, who am I outside of this career? Like who am I outside of this? And that's a grief. And that's grief, that's loss, because we have to think of ourselves outside of our careers and sometimes we define ourselves by what we do. But the thing about titles is a title can be taken. Your true worth and your purpose in life cannot be taken from you. They can change titles all day long, but it does not change who you are as a person, and sometimes I think we kind of forget that. And it's easy sometimes to forget that.
Speaker 1:Cs Lewis said that no one ever told me that grief felt so like fear. And I'm like, hell, yeah, that is so true. Grief is like fear. It is crippling, debilitating. We kind of freeze and we don't know what to do because no one prepares us for grief. No one prepares us for what it looks like to be on the other side to lose something, to be on the other side to lose something, right, we just don't. No one ever says like, hey, this is how you get through grief, because no one does it the same and grief doesn't always look the same, especially when it's like our health.
Speaker 1:I had surgery this year which, honestly, i'm'm like never thought that would happen. I've never had a surgery in my life until now and I'm like, oh my gosh, like who? What is? What does this new normal look like? Because now I got to start really looking at my health and taking care of myself. And it was hard, it was tough. Surgery is not fun, your new normal is not fun. And I just remember thinking to myself like oh my gosh, I don't want to have poor health, I don't want to be the person always at the doctor, I don't want to have poor health, I don't want to be the person always at the doctor. Like this is not how I envision my life. Like how can I rebuild this thing? I mean, when we have health challenges, sometimes it can take us out of work, sometimes it leads to surgery, sometimes it leads us to a new normal. Like it can be so debilitating and there's a sense of loss that comes with that, knowing that we can't do what we used to do, you know.
Speaker 1:But the biggest thing that I learned is that, even though we are grieving something that we're not alone in it and the more that we are able to express the feeling, the emotion that's behind it, the easier it is for us to start identifying where we're at and having open and honest conversations and being okay with being vulnerable about our feelings. Not to say that you're ever going to like being vulnerable with your feelings. I don't. I just don't, because we're never sure how people are going to react when we start being vulnerable, and there's always this idea that someone's going to be offended or think that we are weak or just don't want to deal with it. You know, it's like women that cry and they're like I just don't want to deal with women that's crying, like you know, but we don't like to deal with it because then we have to admit our own feelings and our own vulnerability and for some people that is very, very hard.
Speaker 1:So, in this year of letting go, leaning into the grief, leaning into the loss, accepting it, having conversations around it, accepting it, having conversations around it, being vulnerable around it, has helped. And when I think about that, I'm like I never thought that I would be this person that could truly talk about this in a way that brought me peace. And there's no time limit on grief. Whether it's grief of relationship, loss of someone in your life that meant everything to you, that you loved with your whole heart, whether it's health challenges or changes, loss is loss. And when we start letting go of the mindset that's associated with this time limit on loss, there's no time limit. And when I was talking about yeah, I just want to get to the other side. You know when you're on the other. Yeah, I just want to get to the other side. You know, when you're on the other side it still hurts.
Speaker 1:You just learn to get up every day with the hurt and you learn to not close off the emotions, to be open. And you know it's funny because my husband said something the other day. We were talking about happiness, choosing to be happy. He said you know, you don't have to be happy every day, but you can choose to wake up every day and say today's going to be a good day. It may not be the best day, but it can be a good day and you can choose that. And I was like you're right, I may not be happy every day and I don't have to pretend to be happy, but I can say today's going to be a good day and I like that idea. Good day, and I like that idea.
Speaker 1:The second thing that I learned from this whole journey of letting go is that shame is very crippling and I don't like it, because what I learned was that, when it comes to shame, there's this sense of worthiness, feeling unworthy, feeling unloved, feeling like you don't belong. Shame is defined as a powerful emotion that arises from the perception that we have done something wrong or that we are inherently flawed. And, unlike guilt, which is about specific actions, and unlike guilt, which is about specific actions, shame is often internalized as a negative judgment of your worth, your self-worth, and I'm just like, oh my gosh, when we talk about self-worth and shame, wow, that is so deep. Because no one talks about shame, no one talks about what it feels to not be belonging, because belonging is one of the things that I think I held on to the most when I thought about shame and my self-worth. And I think we all want to feel like we belong, right. I think we all want to feel like we belong right. We all want to feel like we're loved and we're valued and we're seen and we're heard. And we have this sense of shame sometimes around, not feeling good enough, not feeling worthy enough, not feeling like people can love us or who would wanna hear me speak, who would care about what I say. I need to put on all these layers and be all these things. I need to be superwoman over here to get people to make me feel belonging, to give me that validation. But the thing about that is it only lasts for so long before we're looking for another dose of affirmation from someone. You know it's like constantly chasing the validation from someone else.
Speaker 1:And when I started to think about, you know, shame and guilt, I realized that I had this whole idea of who people wanted me to be and that I had lived in this space of pleasing people, being the perfect person. And I remember growing up as a kid, I wanted to make my mom's life easier. So if I could be the perfect child, if I could do all the things that made it a little easier for her, then it would give me this sense of perfection, because now I can be the perfect daughter, I can do all the perfect things. You know, I won't fill up my glass with juice, you know, and drink all the juice up. Nope, I would get the perfect amount of juice and I would drink all my juice and I would rinse my glass out and I would do all the things to make it so easy and I would be perfect. Perfection does not exist. I would be perfect. Perfection does not exist and perfection is an illusion because no one is perfect.
Speaker 1:There is this study in the Journal of Social and Clinical Psychology that found that shame is closely linked to mental disorders, including depression, anxiety, eating disorders and addiction, and that it can often lead to this shame spiral where people feel more and more disconnected from others. Because then we get into this idea of comparison right, we're looking at other people and we're like they got their shit together. You know, I remember like on the days that I was off, like I had this friend that would take her kids to school so they would have to ride the bus, and I'm like what you actually do that and they would stop and buy breakfast. And I'm just like it takes everything in me to get up. You know, get everybody ready, like the school bus is like my gift to have a moment of sanity by myself where I can just fall apart if I need to without the kids being there. And you want to add getting up, getting them ready, getting them to the car, getting them breakfast and dropping them off. I'm like man, these parents are so great I can't do all of that. Like this is too much, like I'm just trying to have a moment, like I just want a day off when I'm off. I'm just trying to have a moment, like I just want a day off when I'm off. I'm off Because I'm going to have to come when they get home, I'm going to have to do homework and dinner and all the things. And I remember feeling so guilty that I did not do this. And then I was like you know what that works for them? It does not work for me. Like there's so much things happening right here in my life that you know it's okay if my kids catch the bus, you know it's okay that I didn't take them through the fast food line to get them breakfast, like it'll be fine. You know, I did little other little things, like I may have brung lunch to school from their favorite place for them to eat, you know.
Speaker 1:But you know we shame ourselves for not being perfect, for not living up to unrealistic expectations that no one, no one does, no one is perfect and that we will not be loved if we're not perfect, which is so not true. I read this quote by Megan Devine that says I'm sorry, wrong person, but no, it was. Let me see, I don't want to get it right here. So Sylvia Rums said in her book why Girls Fail there's a quote that says shame arises when we cannot live up to our own standards or those of society, but we need to learn how to rise above it without the burden of perfection. And when I first started this off, I started out with a quote by Alan Watts and we talked about the only way to make sense out of change is to plunge into it. The only way to get through shame is to plunge into it and recognize it for what it is, because shame is the most powerful master emotion. It's the emotion that underlines all other emotions. It's the fear that we are not good enough, that we are not good enough.
Speaker 1:And John Bradshaw actually explores this in his book Healing the Shame that Binds you, where he explores this idea that shame can be deeply embedded feeling that affects one's entire sense of identity. I mean, just think of you know our family dynamics and how toxic shame can be and paralyzing and distorted it can make our self-image. And a lot of times our shame is rooted in childhood trauma, dysfunctional family dynamics, and it also creates these underlying wounds. And that's how we really start to develop this self-comparison ideas of looking in the window at somebody else. And my mom always says you never know what's going on behind closed doors Before you look at someone else's life and think that they got their shit together and that they're so perfect and they're just living the American dream. You don't know what their life is like when they go in that house and shut that door.
Speaker 1:And my mom used to say this all the time as kids, and you know, at first, you know I would be like what does she mean behind closed doors, like what's happening behind the door? And I got older and I was like I get it, because I'm sure lots of people look at my life and be like, oh, she has her shit together, like she's doing, and they don't see the tears, they don't see the struggles, they don't see the shame, the grief, they don't see none of it, the uncertainty. You know all the struggles and that's why I like to be as open and transparent as possible, because normal life is perfect, but it can be perfectly perfect for you. Perfectly unperfect, it's like I say, like it can be beautifully unbalanced in a way that makes you happy, that lives in your truth and that helps you to live your life unapologetically, helps you to live your life unapologetically. And that's why, as I stepped into this idea of living and letting go this season of my life, it brung up the two things that healed me the most. And we're all still healing, right. We just don't wake up one day and be like, oh my gosh, I'm miraculously healed, I did it, I'm done. No, it does not work that way.
Speaker 1:Like I, have practices, and I think everyone should have some form of practice in their life spiritually. A spiritual practice, not religious, because, you know, we're not all religious people and that's fine, we're all different. But I truly believe that everyone should have a spiritual practice, something that grounds them to their selves, that gives them an opportunity to reflect, to connect to their center, a chance to have a moment of silence, to hear your thoughts, to be with yourself, to love on yourself, to practice self-acceptance and to just say I love the me that I am and I love the me that I'm growing into be. And even though I have not gotten to that point yet, I am still on the journey, and I say that to myself a lot. When I sit in meditation, I often pray and say thank you, thank you for allowing me to have the journey, to learn from the journey and the opportunity to help other people grow into their best versions of themselves, and that makes me feel good, because then that reminds me that my purpose is bigger than me.
Speaker 1:Purpose has nothing necessarily to do with me feeling like I'm better than the next person, because a lot of times, you know, when we are in that feeling of shame and feeling unworthy, for me it feels good to think of myself as better than the next person. Like they're so stupid or they don't know how to do this. Right, I can do that and I'm so good at this, and just having this whole self-righteous attitude and when I get into that I'm better than me, anyone else, like I'm the best ever. I realized that I'm having some feelings of not feeling good enough right now and I need to shame someone else to feel good. It's time for me to step back for a second and to identify the emotion that I'm feeling, and it doesn't necessarily happen in that order. You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1:Like I feel really good about thinking of myself as better, and then I realized that I am not happy, really, cause if I'm so better, then why do I feel like crap? You know? Why am I beating myself up, you know? And then I'm like it's because you're dealing with an emotion that you don't like, that you want to get rid of. And it's easier to pick apart someone else's imperfection than to look at yourself and say, hey, time out, what are you feeling? You got to accept it. You got to accept the feeling and then you can move through it. You know, I'm not saying wallow in it, but I can accept it and say, you know, I just right now I just feel really frustrated and unheard, like my voice isn't, doesn't matter at this moment, and then I can really look at is that really what's happening? Is this really the truth, what's really happening? And sometimes I can immediately identify it and sometimes it takes a couple of days and I have to come back to it. But just being in that space of reflection and having that practice of being able to sit with myself daily in my meditation and feel rooted and connected allows me the opportunity to self-reflect in that way and to get to what it is.
Speaker 1:So if you don't have a spiritual practice, if there's not something that you do daily, even if it's asking yourself a question every day like how do I want to show up today, even that in itself is a way of self-reflection. And then you can also ask yourself at the end of that day you know, did I meet that expectation? What can I do next time? How did I show up? Did I show up as my best version? And if not, you know, was I at least doing the best that I could? And if it's yes, then okay, you can choose to have a good day. It doesn't have to be the best day ever, it doesn't have to be the most joyous day ever, but it was a good day and that's good enough. But it was a good day and that's good enough. They have played a part of my life that.
Speaker 1:It has also helped you to think about some of the things that you wanted to let go of and what that looked like. And if you're still working on it, it's okay. I don't think we ever just pick a word and say let go, and at the end of the year it's completely done, you're healed, you're gone and you're on to the next one. It's a continuous thing, I think. Last year I talked about being present and I'm still always working on being present, being in the moment and as I move through this journey of healing and purpose and finding you know where I fit at and finding my belonging and recognizing that my worthiness does not come from being perfect, but just for being me. I hope that you understand that your worthiness also comes from you just being your imperfect self and just choosing each and every day to show up and remember. Like I said before, you don't have to be happy every day, but you can choose to have a good day.
Speaker 1:If you love this episode and you feel like this would be an amazing episode for someone else to listen to, please share it. If you have a story you want to share, hit me up. I would love to hear your story, and I think that everyone has a purpose in a story that can help the next person to heal. You can also help the next person to understand that they're not alone, and always remember that your voice matters. All right, you guys. That is all the tea that I have to spill today, but join me next time for more time for Tea with Makita. Until next time, my friends, namaste.
