Ep 130 Never Let Anyone Write the Ending to Your Story with Jan Schwartz

In this inspiring episode, host Makita welcomes Dr. Jan Schwartz, an award-winning author, speaker, and expert in criminology, forensic behavior science, and homeland security. Dr. Schwartz shares her journey from growing up in a Chicago suburb, surrounded by organized crime and strong community leadership, to becoming a beacon of resilience and hope. She discusses the profound impact of her loving elementary school teachers, who instilled in her a deep sense of care and leadership, and how these experiences shaped her work in white-collar and organized crime investigations. Dr. Schwartz introduces her concept of "authentic intelligence," a blend of mental, emotional, and spiritual gifts that can empower individuals and communities. She also reflects on her best-selling book, Last Summer with Oscar, and her upcoming release, which explores how to harness these gifts to create a meaningful life. With stories of courage, trust, and humility, this episode is a heartfelt exploration of resilience and the power of authentic connection.

• Key Topics Discussed:
  • Dr. Schwartz’s childhood in a Chicago suburb, influenced by organized crime and strong community leadership.
  • The transformative role of her elementary school teachers in fostering resilience and leadership.
  • Her concept of "authentic intelligence" and its role in personal and communal growth.
  • Insights from her book Last Summer with Oscar and her upcoming release on mental, emotional, and spiritual gifts.
  • A powerful story of standing firm during an interrogation by a Fortune 500 chairman and his mafioso associates.
• Books Mentioned:
  • Last Summer with Oscar: A moving story of love, courage, and a dog’s journey with cancer.
  • Upcoming release: Authentic Intelligence: How to Use Your Mental, Emotional, and Spiritual Gifts to Create the Life and World You Want.
• Key Takeaway: Dr. Schwartz emphasizes the importance of humility, trust, and feeding our mental, emotional, and spiritual intelligence to live resilient, authentic lives.

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Chapters

• 0:00 Introduction and Authentic Intelligence
• 5:44 Chicago Upbringing and Finding Purpose
• 10:11 From Teaching to Criminal Psychology
• 16:15 Confronting Organized Crime
• 23:05 The Birth of Authentic Intelligence
• 35:53 Humility and Sharing Wisdom
• 44:45 Closing Thoughts and Gratitude

Transcript

Jane: 0:00

And so the whole concept in this is that we have a treasure of intelligences, that we're so busy with social media, we're so busy keeping up with our lives, we're forgetting that what we need to do is be feeding our intelligences and not just our egos. And there's ways, fun ways, enjoyable ways to do with our families, to do with our friends, to do by ourselves, to feed our mental intelligence, our emotional intelligence, our spiritual intelligence.

Mikita: 0:34

Hey there, I'm Mikita, a small town girl with big dreams who started a podcast with an old headset and a laptop at my kitchen table and made my dreams come true. On my podcast, time for Tea with Makita, we chat about living life unapologetically, on your terms, from career advice, entrepreneurship, relationships and everything in between. This is your one-stop shop for real conversations and inspiration. If you're looking for connection, then you found it here. Join me every Tuesday as we dive into those sometimes hard to have conversations. So grab your cup of tea or coffee and get comfy, because this is time for Tea with Makita, and the tea is definitely hot.

Mikita: 1:19

Ever feel like you need a superpower boost of motivation with exclusive tips and tools with your goals in mind? Well, say hello to your new inspiration hotspot the Tuesday Tea Newsletter, your weekly infusion of big thinking energy that will propel you to chase your wildest dreams and never shy away from using the power of your voice. Sign up for the Tuesday Tea Newsletter today at Beautifully-Unbalanced. com and elevate your goals to the next level. Welcome back. It is time for tea and I'm your host. Mikita, I want to thank you so much for sharing your time, your space and, of course, your amazing energy with me today.

Mikita: 1:55

Today, I am super excited to welcome Dr Jane Schwartz, an award-winning author, speaker and specialist in criminology, forensic behavior science and homeland security. Her work centers on the power of resilience, hope and what she calls authentic intelligence to help us heal, grow and create the world we truly want. One of her best-selling books Last Summer, with Oscar, shares a moving story of love and courage, and she also has an upcoming release that we're going to talk about later on in this podcast, because this dives deeper into harnessing our mental, emotional and spiritual gifts, and I really want to give us the opportunity to kind of lean in to our authentic intelligence. So join me in giving a heartfelt welcome to Jane. Welcome and thank you so much for sharing your space with us.

Jane: 2:48

Oh, a warm hello to you, makita, and to all of your listeners. It's a privilege to be with you, thank you.

Mikita: 2:56

Thank you. I am really excited to have this conversation. I know during the introduction I was telling people a little bit about you, know what you do and who you are, but I'm just truly fascinated about what first sparked your passion for understanding human potential and resilience in a suburb of Chicago and vividly recall photos of Mayor Richard Daley and organized crime figures, all wearing fedoras, on the Sunday issue of the Chicago Tribune.

Jane: 3:36

And

Jane: 3:36

there was a respect for Mayor Daley because, although no one spoke about it, organized crime was a reality in the Chicago area and there didn't seem to be any concerns of safety in going downtown. People understood that Mayor Daley had his own way of managing the power struggles and turf issues and he was respected for it. And while this was going on and I saw all of that leadership in this wonderful milieu, chicago is a wonderful place to grow up because of the great diversity, the neighborhoods, the blending of all kinds of cultures and attitudes about subjects, and everyone seems to mesh together At the same time. I'm learning about that kind of leadership against such powerful figures of darkness. I had extraordinary leadership and love around me because I was being fueled by the most loving, creative and highly intelligent elementary school teachers. Now we talk about how we treasure our teachers and this was a group. It was this universal spirit among them to just enhance and draw and they provided me with the deepest affection and provided me with leadership opportunities and they were highly intent on drawing out the best and honoring the best in me. So when I grew up, I view those teachers as presenting to me the true love of God, and so, from all that they taught me and from their spirit of treasuring their students treasuring me I began to feel that they were giving me the purest love and, as a result, I view God as my parent. So, you see, I was from a very young age.

Jane: 5:53

I can remember looking out my bedroom window at kindergarten graduation. I had given this speech because, you know, they were always trying to promote me as a leader, not just me but others in their areas where they saw strengths. And so, after I gave this speech, I remember pulling up the blind and looking up and having this conversation with God as if we were in this discussion, because, you see, he was my father. So, from a very young age I had an imprint of profound love and goodness on me that has created such maybe it's so internally a part of my heart, my soul, my essence, that I don't have the same level of fear or apprehension that people I talk to do so in my work, and I'm president of a non-profit, not-for-fee investigative firm and my specialty is white color, organized crime and the white color organized community. So you see, I I'm not in, I'm not in shallow water here, I'm, I'm in the deep end and I've got lots of slippery people that that are working their way around me and hoping to deceive to such competent leadership that my parents never once thought oh, we can't let Jan hop on the bus and then take the L to go downtown Chicago to write her English paper and come back six, eight hours later You're nodding your head. You know that this is not the way life is now in Chicago. So you see, I'm just wanting to emphasize that we were blessed with such a strong figure that was commanding the presence of such a dominating force that we knew was there but was quiet. They were quiet.

Jane: 8:31

And so, as my life went on, and when I stepped out, I became an elementary teacher and went on to be to attend graduate school, to become a family psychologist and, as would have it, my postdoctoral internship was with criminal kids at a residential treatment facility, and when I was there I was filled with such a love, of course, for these future Charles Mansons that you know, 10 of these adjudicated juvenile delinquents were in a cottage with 10 adults and each had their own array of problems and I work with them and their families. But importantly is that my relationship with these kids was such a priority to me that they must have felt it, because when they got into trouble and when they got thrown into this very small room, this padded cell, essentially they would ask to speak with me. So here I was, being able to bring in the love into that cell, and the guard said no, you, he is, he is just too dangerous right now. This is not a good idea and I would just say I waive all concerns. Let me go to Sam and I walked in and, in this very small room, sat down on the mat and he and I began to talk and I walked him out when we finished the talk.

Jane: 10:24

And so when it was time for me to leave to marry my husband actually and my internship had ended, in my exit interview, my supervisor said what do you think it was that you did that was able to impact these challenging kids and their families? Well, I didn't have much self-awareness, truly, makita. I just said well, I just loved them, I loved them all. And she looked at me with a puzzled face like I think there's more to it. But see, I wasn't focusing on what am I doing, right? I just wanted to be there, just like my teachers had been there for me. I wanted that as the imprint that continues to play out. That's one of the themes that you're going to hear again and again in my life is I bring in that quality of caring? Because it is just who I became as a result of those teachers' input and, you know, a great impression on me.

Jane: 11:40

But when life went on and I married my husband and was ready to open my private practice, wanted to save the world, okay, wanted to work with all these families, open a free family therapy clinic, all ready to do it, and wouldn't you know it, the realtor wouldn't show up or the owner of the property didn't bring the right key. And here I was getting these puzzled messages about why can't I find a place to rent, whereas in the background I was having all of these people tell me dark stories and secrets, what was going on, and it was happening at such a frequency that I couldn't dismiss it and more and more, in every event I went to, or when I would be walking somewhere, someone would say you know, I have to tell you this, and perhaps it was because of being a psychologist, because they would think that I may not share their story and their confidence would be protectable. Of course, that would be part of my training to abide, but they weren't clients of mine. It was just that they trusted me, and when people trust me, I take that seriously. Very concerning security incidents that eventually led up to a visit from a Fortune 500 company chairman of the board. His two sons and this chairman wore a fedora and here was his sons and here also accompanying them was their mafioso, and I got interrogated for 25 minutes.

Jane: 13:49

Now you know I'm going to stop right here with this story, because I already told you that my life is marked with two themes. Right, I am face to face, remembering you know what the Torah signified in those pictures, and I'm evaluating what's going on in front of me and I'm experiencing the most terse, the most unpleasant conversation that I had had yet in my life. And I stood firm and I stood strong. And, ladies out there, if you're a person who wears heels, I had my highest heels on that day and I had on a good suit and I looked them firmly in the eye and I straightened out their thinking about who I was, because, you see, they wanted to know what I was doing in their community and what family I was representing. Now, miquita, if you had been exposed to that, would you know what they're meaning when they're saying what family? But see, for me, I knew just what they were doing, because I had been reading these articles, seeing these pictures, as a young child, every Sunday on the coffee table. So it was just all of a sudden, here was something that I was slightly familiar with, albeit just through a newspaper cover, but that was the start.

Jane: 15:26

That was the moment where all of the thoughts about opening a private practice were pushed aside, because I knew this was not normal and that the stories, and for the organized crime leader here of this group to come out of his house Apparently he hadn't been out in three years Something about me was threatening them, and so that was a moment where I said that's it, I'm going to dig into this. And so, to my great surprise, I started what I say surprise. I started what I say pounding the pavement and started building this group of people who and it was all through public information and all done in a spirit of truthfulness, no deception, and that was the beginning, and as time went by, I was gathering up a lot of data and I was creating quite a large chart and I had to reach out to people for advice and for some suggestions, because, what did I know? I got to a certain point and so I would call up the people who were my heroes. Who were my heroes, and it ended up being.

Jane: 16:49

It was the FBI, a high intensity drug unit in a money laundering unit in Manhattan, that I called up and there was a liaison that I called at the DA's Morgenthau's office at the time, and then they connected me to the FBI's hide, a money laundering unit, and they called me and the next day I was there in their offices. Okay, so the the, it, it just. My learning curve was just very, very steep, very, very fast, because the threat was real and the information that I was finding, to my great surprise, was meaningful to the authorities that I eventually reached out to.

Mikita: 17:41

So Wow, like that. That was a lot. I love the fact that you were able to. Your foundation was set.

Mikita: 17:51

Like you, you grew up in a space where you saw what it looked like to be a leader, what it looked like to have resilience Because when you have anyone, that's that's showing you what it means to be a leader.

Mikita: 18:03

There are challenges, there are obstacles, they're overcoming something and the fact that even at a young age you had teachers and people present that saw this potential in you and you always had this great love of people and doing the right thing and building community.

Mikita: 18:27

People and doing the right thing and building community. And I know at one point you must have felt like when those doors were shutting and nobody's showing up with the right keys and they weren't ready, the buildings to you is. I know that was so frustrating and challenging, but I'm sure that through all of that, those experiences taught you about turning your challenges into opportunities of growth. So throughout that, it seems like you had that moment where you could have said, oh my gosh, like the mafia is here, I'm going to go the other way, I'm not going to let you know, I'm just going to go do something else. And yet you said you know what. There's another greater problem here in the community and I'm going to help these, the people in our community, to you know, find their own resilience and to overcome some of that.

Jane: 19:16

Right, and since I was thrown into the deep end of the pool, I was not about when here I had people who trusted me and they were sharing stories. I was the newcomer in the community, so, as I thought about it, at first it was it's just people sharing stories, but then I realized they're terrified. They're realizing that their freedom, their opportunities are restricted, their lives are oppressed because of this dominating force that's controlling everything and bringing a coercion, a coerciveness and a with a way of influencing all decisions made by the community. It made me angry, but I do want to go back a bit. When you said that when, since opening my private practice was something I wanted to do for the longest time. I can't tell you how much I looked forward to that. How much I looked forward to that Because I've had a life of overcoming and I've always viewed that, because I've had so many unusual experiences, that maybe there would be something about my personality or some energy about me that people could feel that I could handle whatever.

Jane: 20:56

They would be telling me that they would be safe with me, they could trust me with their lives, their family's lives, and we could grow together. So you can imagine when I was getting all of these unusual patterns of rejection that I it bothered me deeply. I want to emphasize that I that had been my dream, and for me to let go of a dream that I thought was my path, that, and here I trusted God as my father and and here, very quickly, he pulled it away and sent me zooming at full speed in a direction that no one could have possibly prepared me for. And it was only because of my deepest conviction. And also, you see, I had a good example there on the cover of the Chicago Tribune. I learned that it can be done because it was being done and you know, we just had St Patrick's Day and I always check to see if each year in Chicago, if they still dye the river green, and they do it and it's with a non-toxic coloring. But it's that 60 years, and that was something that the Mayor Daley, it was his gift to the city to celebrate the significance of the Irish Americans to the Chicago area. And he honored groups, he honored cultures and he stood firm, and he stood firm and he protected people. So I already saw it could be done and just vicariously, just stepped in.

Jane: 22:56

And so that same spirit where someone said to me what's your definition of fearless? Do you consider yourself a fearless person? Well, I said I know one thing I certainly do not have fear like other people. Now, if I'm on an airplane and all of a sudden you know we're dropping and it's very turbulent, yes, heaven is, you know, just a little bit up, so that's comforting, but you know it's not a pleasant thought, like are we headed for a difficult flight? I'm not saying I don't have those feelings like any human being would be on an airplane, but when I'm talking about adversity and when I'm talking about facing anger, facing evil, I do not have the same.

Jane: 24:07

And I learned that. And visiting when I was called in by the criminal kids to be with them in their distress. You see, that's another example I had where I stepped in with a knowing and I didn't realize then that I was already utilizing my authentic intelligence, my knowing. I was implementing it then and getting closer to people, which is my ultimate goal, to be trusted people, which is my ultimate goal, to be trusted, to offer help and to empower and raise everyone up and to share everything that I've learned with all of you. That's my ultimate goal, everything I've learned. So I guess the long and short of it is is that those things will be present in everything I do, and so my caring is going to be deeper.

Jane: 24:58

And why is it still continuing?

Jane: 25:02

Because here, let's look at this you have provided me with this lovely opportunity to have a heart-to-heart with you, and it's such a joy to meet you and to be with your listeners.

Jane: 25:13

So, you see, I get this affirmation and I couldn't be happier to connect with you and to receive your questions and your interests and in your desire to share how people have learned to be resilient, to share how people have learned to be resilient, and before we began the taping, I mentioned to you that, boy, wouldn't it be something if there happened to be an emotional vitamin called resiliency. You know that we give to, you know, two-year-olds, three-year-olds, you know where it just becomes. We don't have to call it resiliency, but we can call it something that's age appropriate and say and then, by the time where you're my age, we say never, ever, let anyone write the ending to your story. And we could also say never, ever, let anyone or anything write the ending to your story, never, never. So you see, we can change that sentence. We can provide that emotional vitamin, that little tip through each stage, each year of our lives, because this is how we can live and how we can move toward becoming our most fulfilled self. So inhale courage, exhale doubt and step forward with conviction.

Mikita: 26:50

I like that and I love the fact that you said never let anything or anyone write the ending of your story. I think I tell people that all the time, like you are the author of the story. You know, and sometimes we do have to trust God. You know, sometimes we think we have everything figured out and we are on the path that we think he wants us to be on. We are on the path that we think he wants us to be on, but really all he's doing was giving us tools and giving us people that he's placing in our lives to prepare us for not necessarily what we want to do, but what he has already destined for us to be and to do.

Mikita: 27:31

And when we trust that fully, you're right, you're unstoppable. There is no fear in living in your purpose and stepping into that. And when you mentioned your authentic intelligence, it made me think of the fact that you currently are. Your next book is going to be on authentic intelligence. Can you share a little bit on one piece that you wish that you know if you had to go back and tell yourself your younger self anything when it comes to authentic intelligence? Or just one word of advice you know.

Jane: 28:10

I would like to share with you how this whole concept of understanding this authentic intelligence came about. Another conversation I had and this was when I was writing last summer with Oscar the difficult book about our dogs, detailing the joys and sorrows of him finding his own cure for his cancer, and so I'm one of those people that I don't like staying in that zone of sorrow, so I do something creative and happy. So that's just my personality, okay. So I started creating these, writing down these tips and putting them on Facebook three times a week to kind of buffer what I needed to do. And while I was in a coffee shop, you know maybe in that afternoon crying because I'm writing about Oscar, the next day I'm writing this cheerful tip, you know, for Facebook, so for my friends, and so what? I was having coffee one day with a Facebook friend who happened to be a former Associated Press bureau chief of a major East Coast city and he said to me well, jan, where are you getting these tips? Where are you getting them from? Is it from some book or is it some? Where are you getting these from getting them from? Is it from some book or is it some? Where are you getting these from? It seems like you're talking, so it's probably your ideas, but where are they coming from? And so I was surprised because I didn't expect to come up with this answer. But this is what I said to him Dan, imagine three interrelated circles. The top, left, represents mental intelligence, or IQ. The second to the right, represents emotional intelligence, or EQ, and below it is a circle representing spiritual intelligence, or SQ. The area common to all three circles is where I find my knowing at that convergence. Well, that he said write that down, because that's your next book. And so it is. And that's where this whole book came from, because here my colleague said this is helpful, this is good, and these tips you're doing. So it ends up that I wrote 251 tips, and there are all kinds of things that I have done through all of these years to lead me through and to feed my intelligences so sorry, my allergies, excuse me the mental intelligence, feeding our emotional intelligence, our spiritual intelligence, and so there's all of these tips of activities to do.

Jane: 31:15

But the book begins, and the name of it is Authentic Intelligence how to use your mental, emotional and spiritual gifts to create the life and world you want. And so the whole concept in this is that we have a treasure of intelligences, that we're so busy with social media, we're so busy keeping up with our lives, we're forgetting that what we need to do is be feeding our intelligences, and not just our egos, our egos. And there's ways, fun ways, enjoyable ways to do with our families, to do with our friends, to do by ourselves, to feed our mental intelligence, our emotional intelligence, our spiritual intelligence. And what happens is, as we do it, we provide ourselves with this, in this area of convergence, the greatest wisdom to tap into when we need it.

Jane: 32:16

So when it's time for to make a judgment on something, when it's an emergency and we need to spring into action as a nurse, you know this you're tapping your authentic intelligence all the time, and the greater. If you want to have good judgment, you must feed your intelligences. That's how you get it. And so the fourth intelligence, our inner world, lifts it up, and it's right there, in the middle. Right there, we can tap into it in a second moment. And so the book is about introducing a discussion of all the intelligences. And then there's an interesting chapter on authentic intelligence in action, where there's 10 examples of phenomenal stories of the ending of everything was so excellent because of the authentic intelligence used. Excuse me, so I'm passionate about it, as you might know.

Mikita: 33:28

Well, that's good, because you know what I love when people are passionate about something that gives them purpose. And it's not just passionate because it gives you purpose, it's because you are truly making a difference and you're doing something that you love. And when you do things that you love, you spread that love, even though other people are beacons of light for us and a definition or vision of what we see. As you know, someone to inspire to be or inspire to do more that inspiration for other people when they look at us. And a lot of times when we're doing things in our lives, we don't see how the impact and how influential we really are in other people's lives. So I love when people have such a huge passion and love for just showing up in other people's lives to remind them that, for just showing up in other people's lives to remind them that.

Jane: 34:29

And to keep finding joy in others' achievements and the absolute delight in watching people transform. I can't get enough of it. Those are some things I just couldn't wait to share with you and your listeners.

Mikita: 34:53

Yeah, I think it's so amazing to see someone just find that spark of knowing of who they are. Because when you talk about authentic intelligence like you said, nursing or anything we don't realize how much knowledge we possess, we don't know how much self-awareness that we truly have and sometimes we have to kind of pull back a little bit to see the bigger picture of that. We all bring a sense of wealth and knowledge. Bring a sense of wealth and knowledge. Sometimes we take for granted the things that we just automatically know or feel. Some people can walk into a room and just automatically be gravitated to certain people because of their energy. You can just be in someone's presence sometimes and be like you know what I can feel. They are exactly who they say they are. Their heart is good. They are genuinely a truly amazing person.

Jane: 35:54

Yes, those are very, very wonderful moments to find people like that and to be in their presence. I also wanted to say is that and it's important for us to remember that as we move forward and we develop our ideas um and I provided the example of my colleague giving me his perspective uh, I would never have thought of this book. He well, I was looking the concept, but he said this is your next book. So you see, it's so important to remember as we move through life that we can be enriched. We may not know how others are perceiving us. We may not know how others are perceiving us. It may be they're perceiving us in ways that we need to hear about. So, pulling into the conversation, the valuing of others' perspective, our own perspective, the world's perspective, all of these things it in into consideration.

Jane: 37:11

Okay, this may be how I feel about a certain idea about, maybe this these kinds of foods are good to to serve my family. Well, someone else may have a different perspective. So we're enriched by drawing in others' perspectives about ourselves. If they're kind enough to share it. It may be an opportunity for us to grow and develop and increase our self-perception by their feedback. That's an important task of becoming mature, emotionally mature, is taking in the whole picture and wanting to hear from others. You know so. Human beings are fascinating, aren't they? Yes, yes, you know so. Human beings are fascinating, aren't they?

Mikita: 38:08

Yes, yes, humans are, we are all fascinating individuals and you're right, you have to have that ability to take it all in and I think, a lot of times, even for I would have to say, even like for me, even starting my podcast it wasn't my idea either. For me, like I had no plans to start a podcast, it was my husband who was like you should. You know, I was doing short videos on herbs and, you know, just sharing my love and knowledge of what I've learned. And he was like you know, of what I've learned. And he was like you know, you should start a podcast. And it was just amazing sometimes that people can see little. They plant seeds in us to for us to think outside of the box.

Mikita: 38:58

You know I love the idea of planting seeds of suggestion that you know you can do this if you want, and I feel like that's what your friend did for you. He planted that seed that this could be your next book. It's up to you. But yeah, plant the seed there for you and then you grew it into what it is now and I feel like you know what. I'm just curious as to know where do you feel this journey is taking you and what's the next edge you're stepping toward with your authentic intelligence.

Jane: 39:29

I don't know when we're at right now with the book. Is it's a miracle? But there's 218 people who are the promotional partners and I thank you from the bottom of my heart. Emotional partners and I thank you from the bottom of my heart. And the interest is is? I'm so taken aback by it and I have wondered.

Jane: 39:59

I'm so busy now putting together the book proposal and within the month that'll be done. And then it's time to what we say query book agents. And because I want so much to share everything that I have learned with an international audience, I am so hoping that God will lead me to a book agent who believes so much in the work that they find a publisher, who believes so much in the project that they will want to publish it internationally for the world and especially America's allies. And so you see, I'm pulling together my work in the intelligence gathering field and my colleagues that have impressed me and imprinted my life in so many ways. I will never forget them and I want them to learn the things that I have learned. And then I want you all to go into your areas and share it.

Mikita: 41:20

That's what I want. I love that. I love that and I love the fact that you know you're not just stopping and I feel like you know what. You know everything, not just stopping, and I feel like you know what you know.

Mikita: 41:28

everything happens for a reason and through god, anything is probably I really feel that for you, that next step of you know, taking it and sharing it with not just the inner world of the us, but taking it and sharing it internationally with the yes, the bigger world, other Other people can moment to just. I mean sharing what you learned, you know, sometimes, when we are sharing our ideas and you know things that we went through, it's always nice to know that you know someone else has faced a challenge, but they didn't stay in that situation, that situation that we are all capable of resilience and moving forward from any, anything From anything, and in these tips that I'm sharing real life situations, steps that I did that brought me out of whatever situation I was in.

Jane: 42:30

Each of those tips is feeding mental intelligence, emotional intelligence or spiritual intelligence. So it becomes a fun activity and I'm hoping that many families will do an activity together, together, or if they do the activities individually, then as they're driving somewhere together, they'll say hey, by the way, what did you come up with for this or that? I hope it becomes a fun little piece of conversation. So that's where my thoughts?

Mikita: 43:10

That's where my thoughts. What is one tip you would like to leave?

Jane: 43:23

with listeners or one word of advice, or just something you want listeners to walk away with as they're listening to this now. I think my favorite tip is humility, and Mother Teresa has a wonderful quote where she talks about I'm not going to give you the full quote because I want to just discuss it but she says that we can. We don't have to think of ourselves as less. We don't have to think of ourselves as more. That way, we always know who we are. When we can have a spirit of eagerness and confidence to deliver a speech, to participate in a podcast, humility is that. It is that it's not having the arrogance or boastfulnessfulness. It's not that it's not overdoing the well I don't know if I can do that, I don't minimizing yourself. It's being aware of who you are, but not Not thinking less of what you know, not acting less about what you know about yourself and not acting more about what you know about yourself. It's that's what humility is and that is my favorite tip. It is the most essential grounding and people have mentioned to me over the years when something unusual has happened.

Jane: 45:27

They on Facebook. Why won't you do a huge self-promotion of yourself on Facebook? And I would say I don't know that I right now know how to do that kind of self-promoting without coming across in ways that isn't me. And one way I did announce something on LinkedIn once was I credit? I announced it was when I became a fellow of the American Psychological Association, and it was a huge, a huge gift, a huge award. And I announced it by saying I dedicate this post to everyone who has believed in me, and the reaction was an opportunity to do some wonderful connecting with people that I don't get to talk to that much anymore, and that was just excuse me. It was a moment of true, genuine happiness and, um, I hope that I will find more ways to be able to promote the book that fall into that zone of energy. I'm constantly a student of life.

Mikita: 47:13

Thank you so much. I just want to say thank you, Jane, for sharing your wisdom and reminding us of the power of resilience and authentic intelligence. Your insight on overcoming challenges and embracing our full potential are sure to resonate with our listeners. So thank you so much for being part of this community.

Jane: 47:31

I'm so pleased to meet you and to be with you today. Thank you so much for the invitation.

Mikita: 47:36

All right, you guys. That is all the tea that we have to spill today. Until next time, namaste.